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Roy Janik

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Kill Mulder and you risk turning one man's religion into a crusade. [May. 20th, 2002|01:49 am]
Roy Janik
or: Now I "Know My Exit" and I know it sucked.

The last X-Files sucked, just as it's (mostly) sucked for a long time now.
Still, it's sad to see it finally die. The show over the years certainly had its moments:

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SCULLY: Mister Swaim, we're here to take you into custody to question you about some recent murders.
BLOCKHEAD: I don't answer any questions until I talk to my lawyer.
MULDER: Who's your lawyer?
BLOCKHEAD: I represent myself.
SCULLY: Sir, if you're going to be uncooperative, I'll have to handcuff you.
BLOCKHEAD: What gives you fascists the right to do that?
SCULLY: Did I not mention we're federal agents?
BLOCKHEAD: Did I not mention I'm an escape artist?
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JOSE CHUNG: Then there are those who care not about extraterrestrials, searching for meaning in other human beings. Rare or lucky are those who find it. For although we may not be alone in the universe, in our own separate ways on this planet, we are all... alone.
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CIGARETTE-SMOKING MAN: Life... is like a box of chocolates. A cheap, thoughtless, perfunctory gift that nobody ever asks for. Unreturnable, because all you get back is another box of chocolates. You're stuck with this undefinable whipped-mint crap that you mindlessly wolf down when there's nothing else left to eat. Sure, once in a while, there's a peanut butter cup, or an English toffee. But they're gone too fast, the taste is fleeting. So you end up with nothing but broken bits, filled with hardened jelly and teeth-crunching nuts, and if you're desperate enough to eat those, all you've got left is a... is an empty box... filled with useless, brown paper wrappers.
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DETECTIVE MUNSON: Why don't you go back to your hotel and get some sleep.
MULDER: I didn't check into a hotel room. I don't sleep anymore.
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SCULLY: Well, it seems to me that the best relationships-- the ones that last-- are frequently the ones that are rooted in friendship. You know, one day you look at the person and you see something more than you did the night before. Like a switch has been flicked somewhere. And the person who was just a friend is... suddenly the only person you can ever imagine yourself with.
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SUSANNE: They [the government] want to control every aspect of our lives, from the cradle to the grave. They practically do already.
SUSANNE: Hotel Bible, who do you think put this here?
LANGLY: The government?
SUSANNE: One in every hotel room in America, it's the perfect vessel for electronic surveillance. No one ever questions its presence.
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CIGARETTE SMOKING MAN: I gave you responsibility. I gave you a position. I gave you the things that you couldn't get yourself and you can't do the job!
SPENDER: Keeping Fox Mulder down is not a job. It's your dirty work!
CIGARETTE SMOKING MAN: You pale to Fox Mulder.
------------------
SCULLY: Since when did you get a waterbed?
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: nekomouser
2002-05-20 07:49 am (UTC)

Ahhhh, Morgan and Wong, you Space: Above and Beyond writers you!

Shoot, you might as well post the entire Jose Chung script...

Jose Chung: "Alex Trebek? The game show host?"
Scully: "Mulder didn't say that it was Alex Trebek. It was just someone that looked incredibly like him."
---------------
Jose Chung: "Aren't you nervous telling me all this after receiving all those death threats."
Blaine Faulkner: "Well, hey, I didn't spend all those years playing Dungeons and Dragons and not learn a little something about courage."
---------------
"You ever flown a flying saucer? Afterwards, sex seems trite."
---------------
Mulder: "Have you ever found a metal implant in your body?" [Cook shakes his head] "Have you checked everywhere?"
---------------
Scully: "Just as long as you're attempting to record the truth..."
Jose Chung: "Dear god no! How could I possibly do that?"
---------------
Detective Manners: "Well, thanks a lot! You really bleeped up this case!"
Scully: "Well, of course he didn't actually say 'bleeped', he said —"
Jose Chung: "I'm familiar with Detective Manners' colourful... phrasiology."
---------------
Scully: "In short, Roky showed signs of what is known as a fantasy-prone personality."
Jose Chung: "Agent Scully, you are so kind-hearted. He's a nut."
---------------
Blaine Faulkner: "I hate this town. I hate people. I just want to be taken away to some place where I don't have to worry about... finding a job."
---------------
Blaine Faulkner: "...the proper authorities showed up with a couple of men in black. One of them was disguised as a woman, but wasn't pulling it off. Like, her hair was red... but it was a little too red, you know? And the other one, the tall lanky one, his face was so blank and expressionless. He didn't seem human. I think he was a mandroid. The only time he reacted was when he saw the dead alien.
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